Imagine it’s Wednesday, and unexpectedly you have the day off. It’s a week day, so you could probably justify all the reasons you should be catching up on errands, visiting a family member, lunch with a friend, or getting on top of that mess in the spare bedroom. But what about making time together with your partner, to just be together. To connect, share some space. When was the last time you sat together and just held hands while you enjoyed that extra cup of coffee and read the paper to each other? Why not take some time to simply take a long shower together this morning, and even go straight back to bed, to indulge in some long, uninhibited, noisy love making? Maybe even indulge in seconds so that those multiple orgasms are triggered and enjoyed?
On the weekend, if not working, there are a dozen or more things you can do. Every day after work or early morning, there are a million reasons to not take time to enjoy horizontal time out together. Months can go by and you’re only having sex once or twice a week, if you’re lucky and it’s become a release, or quiet, quick affirmation to each other rather than a full expression of love for each other.
This is the kind of thing we need to prioritise. Time for making time together. To indulge in pleasure, taking the time to do that well. To step into the space we hold open for each other to be fulfilled.
When you first start a new relationship – or go back to a ‘honeymoon phase’ within an existing relationship you make this kind of time for each other. It’s new, it’s exciting, you can’t get enough of each other. The sex is good, you’re exploring. You’re indulging and learning. So, who said you had to get on with life and stop doing that? No one. Over time, we default to the ‘basics’ and settle for what’s necessary, not what we truly want for or with each other. Sometimes we have to just take the bull by the horns and say – enough, time for US and if we need to schedule it like we would anything else in our lives of importance, that’s what we’ll do. And we’ll commit to that. Because we know if we were new at this relationship we would have no problem with doing that.
If you don’t do this, before you know it, years have gone by and you’re barely functioning as a high functioning loving couple any more – instead you’re just doing what needs to be done, and dissatisfaction starts to take over – at least for one partner. When that happens, if you’re not willing or able to make time for togetherness that really counts, then you’ll be having to navigate doing that with another partner anyway, so why not just prioritise the relationship you’re already in. 😊
For more about this, join the discussion on our FB Group – Horizontal Happiness